Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
