office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
