So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
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