I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
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