Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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