she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
