I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
