do herpes really smell.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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