i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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