Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
