come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Randomize
