Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
YAS. BRING CRAB.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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