Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Vodka?
Forever.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
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