We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize