So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
