Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
