Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
