Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
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