that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
It was confusing and full of hummus
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
