i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
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