But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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