What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Randomize
