Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
My vagina just recognized that song.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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