The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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