youre lurking in front of me
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Randomize