Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
