After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
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