Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge

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(803): View more from South Carolina

i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.

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(513): View more from Ohio

She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy

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(773): View more from Illinois

Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me

(847): View more from Illinois

No promises.

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(368): View more from

you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.

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(609): View more from New Jersey

How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?

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(817): View more from Texas

HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds

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