Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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