we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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