so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
