There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Randomize
