You can't motorboat a personality
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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