Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Randomize
