but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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