Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize