he looks like a really good dad on facebook
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
