I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Randomize
