In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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