singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
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