Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
