I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
