dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
