wrigley field is MILF paradise
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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