Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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