Fine. I'll sleep in my office
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
