Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
