Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Randomize
