i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
