I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
pray to the hookup gods
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Randomize
